Our children watch us everyday. Who we are shouts louder than anything we say.
I had a conversation the other day with a good "mom-friend" about how competitive some other moms can be. If they know other kids the same age as their kid enrolled in a class, they sign them up. If so-and-so is potty trained, well, then their kid has to learn too. That kid knows his ABC's? Well, their kid knows how to spell "cat" and their own name.
We decided that neither of us care much about how our kids stack up against others, as long as they seem to be developing according to their own natural abilities.
Sure, I want my kids to be good at things like reading and writing, and I don't want them to struggle with algebra or chemistry. I want to give them every tool I can to excel at these things.
We read together every night. We have flashcards. We practice colors and everything is identified according to the shape it is, the quantity of the item, and the first letter of the word.
When I was little, my mom, who dropped out of high school, by the way, had me reading and writing my own name and some other words before I started kindergarten at age four. I had wonderful teachers who saw that I needed a little extra challenge. In first grade I was allowed to go read in the library when all of my other work was finished. I've always been a bookworm, and this love of reading helped me have an easier time later in school. In high school I think maybe at times they expected a little more from me, but they knew I could handle it and I'm glad I didn't get to float through doing the bare minimum.
I learned a lot from books and teachers and classrooms and chalkboards.
But that is not the most important thing that I have ever learned.
I watched my parents help people when they could. People they didn't even know. I remember a time when we were getting off the highway in a very bad snowstorm and my Dad stopped to help an older woman get unstuck.
I saw certain teachers treat even their "worst" students as though they were worth teaching.
I learned that if you are not kind and considerate to other people, whether you know them or not, whether you agree with their lifestyle or not, then knowledge from a book or formal instruction will not get you very far at all.
So, when I consider what I want my children to be the best at, well that's easy.
I doesn't matter if Hanson crawls before other babies his age.
If Landon still needs help going to the potty, big deal.
I could care less if they can read the longest book.
I don't give a crap if they are the fastest skater on the ice.
I really won't be bothered if they say the word "crap".
I really won't put much thought into them being able to burp the loudest.
If someone tells me that my kid is nicer than any other kid they know, then I have done my job.
