GRASP

"I can explain it for you, but I can't understand it for you."

When a baby is learning to self-feed, pediatricians (read, my pediatrician) frequently asks how they are progressing with their "pincer grasp".  This is loosely defined as the child's ability to pick something up with between their thumb and first finger and maneuver it (usually into their mouth).

Which is why it is perfect that "grasp" can also mean "to understand"....because some people just can't pick up and idea and maneuver it within their mind.

For example:
I called a local restaurant requesting to reserve their large back room because a bunch of my coworkers and I had plans for someone for their birthday lunch.  I explained to the person answering the phone that I would like to reserve the back room if available for that afternoon.

Restaurant: "We can't do that...you have to request the room a day in advance."

Me: "Oh, darn, someone already has it reserved?"

Restaurant: "No, but I can't reserve it for you because you didn't call yesterday."

At this point I became both thoroughly confused and irritated at this notion.

Me: "I don't understand.  If nobody has the room reserved why can't I request it now?"

Restaurant: "Because it has to be requested at least a day in advance."

Me: "So you won't be able to accommodate us?"

Restaurant: "Yes, probably because no one has the room reserved."

At this point I debated between screaming and hanging up, but the calmer more polite me took over.

Me: "Would you like us to spend money there or not?"

Restaurant: "Of course, our customers are valuable to us!"

Me: "But I can't reserve a room that is available because I'm calling too late....which means you could give the room to someone else, so why should we come there if we aren't sure there will be space?"

Restaurant: "Ummmm......"

Me: "We'll be seeing you at one, and if the back room is available we'd like to sit there."

Restaurant: "Thank you."

At this point the conversation ended, neither of us fully understanding what the other person was trying to get across.  I wondered if this person ever fully developed their pincer grasp.

But, about four hours later, there we were, in the back room, using our thumbs and forefingers to shovel pizza and appetizers into our mouths.  And I still don't grasp what took place in that conversation.